Building your wardrobe around YOU

So how do you determine if *you* need to change your Loli style to a more mature one? Ask yourself what you enjoy about the scene and how you feel about wearing the items in your current wardrobe. Do you cringe a bit at the bright pastels and feel self-conscious about clutching a bunny-bag at a meetup? Or do you look at those non-print modest dresses on the IW page and get bored to tears? You will need to find that precarious balance between keeping what thrills you about being a loli with what your current comfort level is. Nobody can tell you when (or if!) to give up sweet, you will know.

Personally, I decided to refurbish my wardrobe and shape it into something cohesive that will better reflect the things I love about Lolita and that will hopefully bring out the best Lolita in me. That last part is really important. Do you want people to see you wearing an awesome print, or do you want them to see an awesome Lolita? Is the focus on the dress or on you? When I see other lolis that have amazing style, I think what I respond to most is their ability to look effortless and comfortable and very much themselves.

So look through pictures of your outfits and pick the ones that look effortless, the ones where you are clearly smiling and enjoying yourself (not awkwardly tugging up your skirt and standing funny because of your too-high heeled shoes etc). Find the ones where you are at your most YOU and that should pinpoint your style. Something I’ve had to face up to is that I’m a fairly basic Lolita. I’m never going to stun anyone with a super-creative coordinates and even when I’ve tried OTT it just sort of fizzled. Give me a lace blouse, a jsk, a cardi and some cute socks and well-made shoes and I’m a happy lady.

AND THAT’S OK.

One of the best things about selling off a Lolita wardrobe and starting fresh, was that I could make a long-term and long-range plan. Instead of buying based on what caught my imagination and simply made my heart flutter regardless of how it would or would not work, I decided to stick to a color palette of browns, ivories, burgundys, reds and blacks. I made a list of outliers left over from my sales (the sax/white bag I’m apparently never going to sell, a whole drawer-full of socks, the pink strawberry BtSSB bag that I purchased RETAIL – ugh!) and decided to cut my losses. There’s no sense throwing good money after bad and investing more in a look that isn’t going anywhere. I considered when I would be wearing Loli (meets and conventions) and targeted a few key pieces that would work with the kinds of meets and conventions I liked going to. Here is my personal list:

1) Something super fancy for those expensive teas. Something with a longer skirt that would suit pearls and gold.
2) Someting mid-range fancy. For mid-range meets that might include dinner, or a ballet or seasonal events.
3) Something more casual for going shopping or doing outdoorsy things. Something inexpensive that can “work” outside of loli.
4) Hot weather and cold weather appropriate items (since we get a range of temps here from over 100 degrees to 10 below zero).
5) A few accessories that would be more meet specific – an A&tP hat that can transform a plain outfit into Pirate Loli! Or a straw hat for Country/picnic meets.
6) Rings and necklaces and bracelets that could either sweeten up a coordinate or tone it down.
7) One high quality natural looking wig for hair emergencies.
8) Well-fitting, comfortable non-loli shoes that coordinate with the loli outfits planned.

Here is a typical coordinate I put together using this criteria:

Since I already had a few good blouses, socks, shoes, parasols and bags left over from my sweeter days, this meant I only had to purchase a few print and non-print jsks and accessories. Buying like a magpie left me with a very random closet and surprisingly few complete outfits. Buying strategically allowed me to build a surprisingly small but hard-working closet. My closet is not at all envy-inducing … but it works for my needs, my priorities, and my lifestyle.